Recovery ~ First 4 days

Recovery hasn't been as bad as I had imagined in my mind. The day of delivery was horrid but once we got the pain medication right and given at the right time I felt a lot better. I got up and walked as soon as I could and stayed a full 4 days in the hospital. Being able to go down and see the babies was nice, at first I wasn't sure how it would work since I wasn't a parent. I know they are really strict but J got Steve and I passes to be able to see the babies at any time. The nurses were very nice and didn't make me feel out of place and I tried to limit my time so I didn't get in the way of family.

It was emotional to see the babies, I was so happy they were doing well but seeing the IV's, feeding tubes and heat lamps just broke my heart. I felt like I had let everyone down, I needed to hold them in a little while longer but my body just didn't have anything left. J & J encouraged me to hold and feed the babies and that meant a lot and helped me emotionally.

I started pumping the day after delivery but didn't get much I waited for my milk to come in and each day I got a little more and every ounce counted. I have never pumped for any of my surro-babies so I wasn't sure how I would feel but I am so glad I was asked to because being able to pump for them makes me feel like I am still helping them grow and be strong.

I came home yesterday late afternoon and I was so ready. Getting my staples out wasn't bad either, there were a few that hurt but for the most part it went ok. It was hard leaving knowing the babies had to stay and J & J couldn't take them home. Today was my first full day home and I spent most of it in bed and pumping. I don't want to over do it cause I don't want to make this recovery longer or harder than it has to be. Steve has been so amazing doing everything for me and just loving me. My brother has also been a huge help for a 16 year old he surprised me with everything he has done along with my mom, I have such a great support system and it means the world to me.

The babies are 5 days old: Joshua is doing awesome, he isn't hooked up to anything and is a big eater. I think his personality is already starting to show. Madelyn is doing good but is having a few issues with holding her body temperature and eating. She is a lazy eater and sleeps all the time which is complete opposite of how she was inside me. I love watching J & J hold them and bond with them and I feel so blessed to be able to watch this family grow.