My first Surrogacy Journey ~ Amber

I always knew I wanted to be a wife and mother and once I had my daughter I felt so complete. She made me a different person, a better person and from that point on I felt like I didn't want to live my life without making a difference. When my daughter was about 1 years old I met a women who was a surrogate and literally from that moment on I was intrigue and began to research it. I would read and think about it and then let it go and so on but it always seem to be in the back of my mind. I realized it was God's plan for me, it was my way of making a difference and Lord knows I had no idea what a blessing it would be to so many.

My first surrogacy journey started in 2001. After knowing that surrogacy was something that was apart of me and something I was meant to do I contacted an agency and got set up to become a surrogate. I was listed as a Gestational Surrogate which means I am only the carrier and the baby is no part of me by DNA. I was matched with a single man named Steve who had two sons through surrogacy already. I couldn't imagine why he would want more kids so when I talked to him and he explained to me that he had frozen embryos left and to him they were children. So he would use them all and let God determine how many children he would have. After getting past my reservations and getting to know him and his boys I knew more children would be a blessing to this family. We talked on the phone and via email but did not meet in person before the transfer. I flew to Canada with my mother in law in tow (I was to scared to go alone and Steve couldn't make the transfer) and got ready for my very first IVF process. 3 frozen 3 day embryos were transfer and the 2 week waiting period to find out if they took began. It was so hard to sit and wait I didn't test never even thought to but sadly it did not take and I wasn't pregnant. We immediately began the process again and once again I flew to Canada this time alone. I was very excited and determined that this time would be it this time I decided to test and everyday got nothing so when it was time to go for the blood drawn I was so sad and knew it didn't work but that September our second IVF attempt had taken and I was pregnant. Even though all the pee test came back negative I was in deed pregnant.

I was very sick for the first 3 months as I had been with my daughter. I did not work and enjoyed being pregnant and being home with Rylee. I met Steve for the first time when I was a few months along and we spent a few days together getting to know each other. His boys were so cute and only made me feel more comfortable with the choice I had made. We continued to talk by phone and email as he lives in another state and the further along I got the more excited I got. I loved being a surrogate!

I enjoyed my pregnancy and found that most people were clueless about surrogacy. Rylee was very young and didn't understand the process at all she didn't even know I was pregnant so there wasn't much to explain to her. Steve was supportive but it did take some adjusting to on both our parts. I had made many new friends during this time in my life and I was set to go to Dallas for a moms meet up and I thought to myself maybe I shouldn't go I had Rylee at 36wks and this is kinda pushing it. I had a OB appt that day ad told my friends if everything is ok than I will go with yall. I went to my appt and was sent straight over to the hospital. My blood pressure was high and I was diagnosed with pre-clamsia, they were going to monitor me and I was told I wouldn't be able to go home and would have to stay in the hospital for the next week or so till it was time to deliver. Well that didn't take long because my blood pressure wouldn't come down so it was decided that I would be induced the next day. I called Steve to let him know and he packed up the family and headed our way. The induction was started on he was on his way, he called to check in and said I have a surprise for you. I'm thinking a surprise woohoo i'm excited. :) After an intense labor of 7.5 hours at 37 weeks Amber 7lbs 3oz and 20inches long was born 3 weeks early on Father's day in 2003.

She was such a precious baby girl and I enjoyed the time we spent together before she went home. Steve was so great about giving me all the time I wanted and needed with her. I had prepared myself for how it would be when she went home and her not being my baby however I didn't prepare myself for what would come shortly after she left. I had to stay longer because my blood pressure still hadn't stabilized so I gave my kisses and hugs to all and off she went and than I began to cry and cry and cry. A nurse came in and tried to console me saying its ok

So lets not forget about my surprise Steve told me about well there she is (above) the little baby girl I am holding in my arms named Ruby. Yup that was my surprised Steve decided to have two surrogates try and get pregnant at the same time hoping at least one of us would get pregnant well both of us got pregnant but the other surrogate delivered way early so by the time I had Amber, Ruby was already here and ready to meet her sister. At first I was shocked and then angry, here I was so excited to give him his first daughter when in reality he already had one. :( I felt like he should have told me and well it just wasn't something I wanted to know while in labor.  However I quickly realized how excited he was to introduce me to Miss Ruby and I could see there was no ill intentions on his part also its not required of him to tell me anything so I decided to embrace the moment and love on both girls and was thankful Amber had a sister.

I saw Amber again when she was 4 months old. It was so nice to spend the day with her while Steve took care of business. She smiled at me the whole day and I always believed she knew who I was.

Since she lives in another state I have watched her grow on-line through photos and updates and I never forget her birthday. Amber now has 6 siblings the youngest being a set of twins, all through surrogacy. She is a happy little girl and I am so thankful Steve has allowed me to be in her life. Amber calls me her mommy in Texas and it truly touches my heart.

 (Left)Ruby and Amber(Right)

Thank you Steve